The fun and frolics of internet dating.

So, my ex was an arse as you all know and I decided that I was not going to sit around moping my life away but that I was going get myself out there and have some fun.  Or at least poke my head round the door and see what fun there was to be had.  So I joined a free dating website.  I can hear you now, a mixture of responses; It's dangerous, They are all weirdos, My friend met her husband on one of those, I had a great time doing that.  All of these statements are true but I figured if I chose wisely and then stayed sensible, everything would be OK.

So lets tackle that first statement, it's dangerous.  Of course it's potentially dangerous, I know nothing about any of the people I meet on these sites but how many of us meet our partners in a club or a bar?  Do we know anything about them when we're dancing away or locking lips?  No.  I had a friend who met a man through mutual friends, they were a wonderfully loved up and happy couple until the day they married.  The day the door shut behind them on their wedding night he knocked the crap out of her because she was now his property.  She had a long time to get to know him and it was still dangerous for her.  As long as you choose your dates carefully (these days facebook helps because you can see their interactions with their friends before hand) and you meet in a safe place, you should be fine.

The second statement, that they are all weirdos cannot of course be 100% true because not everyone out there looking for love is broken or crazy.  They are just shy or like me no longer fancy meeting someone in a bar or club when they are ten sheets to the wind and can't walk straight.  Again, it's the correct choice.  You can't really tell by how a person looks, especially not in a photo but if (for example) they are posing with flexed muscles you can probably guess they have ego/ vanity issues and if you don't want that, you avoid it.  Get to know them a little first.  I have had two dates so far.  The first one I chatted to a bit via text and on the phone a couple of times before we met up and the second I texted on and off for two weeks.

The other two statements are positive and I think that most people these days know of an internet romance success story of some sort.

So my dates.  The first was a guy who wasn't my type to look at and although I wouldn't have said he was unattractive, he did nothing for me.  However, I am trying to look beyond types and anything shallow and he seemed nice so I gave him ago.  As it was we got on OK but there was no spark for either of us so we just ended up getting drunk and having a good night out.  So it may not have been a romantic success story but it was a success in the fact that I was safe, I had fun and met someone who was a gentleman.   My second date was slightly different.  We had been chatting and texting and I knew he wasn't looking for anything serious because he doesn't have the time to put in the required commitment needed in a relationship but I decided that it was probably about time I just had some fun and stopped looking so hard for love. He was also another really lovely guy but to cut a long story short we both decided we couldn't do the casual thing and he wasn't interested in anything else.  For me, I may have thought he was extremely handsome but we didn't have anywhere near enough in common for anything serious.

So have I been put off?  Not so far.  I may not have met Mr Right yet but I've been shown that there are still some decent guys left out there and that in itself is a huge step forward.  Maybe date number three (watch this space) will be more successful.  It's my lucky number after all.